Self-Care? Call It What You Want...Just Stop Running Yourself Into the Ground

Let’s just say it: the word “self-care” has been so overused it’s practically lost all meaning.

It’s been plastered on every candle, face mask, and $70 jade roller in existence. “Treat yourself!” they say. “You deserve it!” Sure, but buying bath bombs doesn’t fix burnout.

Here’s the truth: maintenance, recovery, recharging, it’s really about not running yourself into the ground.

Because burnout isn’t a badge of honor, and admittedly, I used to think it was until my health started to suffer.

Also, exhaustion doesn’t make you more accomplished, it just makes you miserable.

What Self-Care Really Means

Somewhere along the way, “self-care” got turned into an aesthetic. But real self-care? It’s not something you post on Instagram; it’s something you practice when no one’s watching.

It’s not escaping your life it’s designing one you don’t need to escape from.

It’s the everyday stuff that doesn’t make a highlight reel:

• Saying no before you hit your breaking point.

• Actually sleeping instead of doom-scrolling.

• Eating real food instead of living on coffee and chaos.

• Moving your body because it changes your mood, not just your pants size.

This isn’t indulgence, it’s maintenance. Like getting an oil change before your engine explodes.

Why We Resist Taking Care of Ourselves

Let’s be real, most of us were raised to equate “taking care of ourselves” with being selfish.

Especially women. We’ve been taught to take pride in doing it all, the house, the work, the kids, the invisible emotional labor and to call it “love.” But here’s the catch: if you keep pouring from an empty cup, eventually there’s nothing left to give.

If your phone battery drops to 2%, you don’t just keep scrolling. You plug it in like your life depends on it.

Yet somehow, we think we can run on fumes forever.

Spoiler: we can’t. And when we try, it shows in our health, our moods, our relationships, and the way we start resenting everyone who dares to ask us for one more thing.

The real clue for me came with my health care provider telling me I needed to quit my job or it was going to kill. Lets be real real for a minute, nobody can just quite thier job and that should not have been what she said to me. To be honest, I didn't see that doctor again and instead started looking for ways to improve on the stress in my life.

The BALANCE Approach to Self-Care (Without the Fluff)

In my BALANCE Framework, the “NURTURE” step isn’t about bubble baths and green juice it’s about the daily decisions that keep you grounded, fueled, and sane. Think of it like your personal tune-up plan:

Fuel Wisely

Coffee and chaos are not food groups. Eat real food. Drink water. Your body can’t function on vibes and drive-thru meals. Yes, I totally still have a coffee or energy drink from time to time, but long gone are the days of 3 or 4 of them to keep me going.

Rest Without Guilt

You don’t have to earn rest. You’re a human being, not a machine. Rest because you need to, not because you’ve finally collapsed. I am not talking about naps, I am talking about taking a day just to do nothing and...here is the catch, don’t feel guilty about it.

Move Because You Can

Exercise isn’t punishment for what you ate, it’s a celebration that you get to move. Find something that feels good and do it consistently. I am still not good at this, but even going to walk through the mall on my day off to window shop gets those steps in before you know it.

Protect Your Energy

Every time you say yes to something that doesn’t serve you, you say no to something that does. Your peace is not a luxury item. Sometimes, we think that by saying yes to everything, it makes us a better mom, but guess what, my kids barely remember yesterday, let alone all the late-night bake sessions for the PTO.

Check In, Not Out

Self-care is not about numbing out with wine and scrolling (for the record, we’ve all been there). It’s about paying attention to what’s off and realigning before you break down.

The Myth of “Doing It All”

We glorify being busy like it’s a personality trait. “How are you?” “Oh, busy!” Translation: I’m tired, overwhelmed, and one minor inconvenience away from a meltdown.

But balance isn’t doing everything perfectly. It’s knowing what’s worth your energy and what’s not.

You can hustle and still rest.

You can care deeply and still have boundaries.

You can love your people and still say, “I need a minute.”

That’s what real self-care looks like, not running yourself into the ground and calling it commitment.

When You Ignore It Long Enough…

Eventually, your body starts keeping score. Headaches, fatigue, irritability, insomnia, brain fog, all warning lights flashing “you’re out of balance.”

Ignoring your needs doesn’t make you strong; it just makes your crash harder when you finally can’t keep up.

And here’s the thing: no one’s handing you a medal for how much you can tolerate. You don’t get extra credit for suffering.

Rewriting the Narrative

So maybe “self-care” is an overused buzzword. Fine. Then let’s rename it: self-respect.

Taking care of yourself isn’t indulgence; it’s a declaration that you matter.

It’s saying, “I deserve to be well. I deserve to feel good. I deserve to exist as more than what I do for others.”

That’s not selfish, that’s sustainable.

Bottom Line

Call it self-care, maintenance, recovery, or survival... it doesn’t really matter what you name it.

What matters is that you actually do it.

Because you can’t show up for your family, your business, or your purpose if you’re constantly running on fumes.

So no, you don’t need a bubble bath and a vision board ( though, I do love a good vision board session) you need boundaries, sleep, and a plan that keeps you from losing your mind.

Take a break.

Eat the meal.

Turn off the phone.

Breathe.

Not because it’s trendy, but because it’s necessary.

If that post hit home, here’s your next step a simple, realistic way to start putting it into action.

I created the 30 Days of Self-Respect Challenge, a free printable calendar filled with small, practical things you can do each day to recharge, reset, and actually take care of yourself, minus the fluff, guilt, or $60 candles.

Think of it as your daily reminder that you deserve maintenance, not meltdown.